Torn

I am so torn

Between what is right

And what feels right

I know

We aren’t meant to be

I know

We never can be

I know

You don’t belong to me

So why do I crave

Your touch

Your glance

Your kiss

At every stolen chance

The angel and devil

On my shoulders

Both agree

Being with you

Completes me

Temporarily

But my conscience

My soul

My inner peace

Are tearing each other apart

Each have their own opinion

And are terrorising

My fragile, gullible heart

A few moments of happiness…

A vacation from life…

A lifetime of guilt…

I am so torn

Between what is right

And what feels right

 ~S~

Unattainable

I make it harder on myself

Wishing for you to be mine

to grasp your attention

Trying to hug a wisp of smoke

As thoughts of you

Race through my mind

Untethered

Wild and free

Heart pounding

Breathless

Wanting you

Needing more

That’s how I feel

When you come closer

I breathe you in

Deep into me

My soul soars

Yet I wonder

How can this be

When you are so far

Out of my reach

Completely unattainable…

~S~

Fire and Ice

I am drawn to your warmth

Your heat thaws me out

Slowly

I turn to liquid

As you look my way

Your body is an inferno

From a snow storm

I become a dew drop

I stand no chance

In your smoldering embrace

I melt into you

Your heat engulfs me

And we become one…

Your flames turn to ember

While I Sizzle and turn to steam

Inside My Head

Scratching at these four walls

Trying to claw my way out

This windowless space

I can barely breathe

I am helpless

My very essence

screams out for help

My soul weeps

into its bindings

These chains

Wrapped around my throat

Constricting…

Tighter and tighter

I cannot escape

I am trapped

Within myself

The world passes me by

Yet no one sees

The panic behind my smile

I am unable 

To reach out

And save myself

Unable to ask

for help

I am stuck

Inside my Head...

Obsession

This fatal attraction 
that draws me to you
like a moth to the flame
I am unable to resist
your lure
as you pull me in 
your essence 
drowns my soul
your thoughts 
crowd my mind
your presence
ignites my desires
I am overwhelmed 
by you
my want
my need 
my obsession...

~S~ 

Never mine...

When I am with you

I forget…

…the past,

…the pain,

…who I am,

…WHAT I am.

When I am with you

There is…

…hope,

…love,

…passion.

When we are apart

I am…

…broken,

…forlorn,

…distressed.

Yet you are

…unattainable,

…Irresistible,

…never going to be mine.

 ~S~

Mercy...

Roughly,

Invisible hands

Hold my eyelids closed

Against my will

A kaleidoscope of memories

Of your face,

Your smile,

Your essence…

Flitter unabated

On this makeshift screen

The past bleeds out

as gushing tears

Unwelcome…

Unnecessary…

The pain that courses through my veins

Replaces the blood

That sang out your name

STOP!!

I can’t take anymore…

Free me from this prison

And wipe my mind clean…

Leave no trace…

I want you gone…

I beg of you

Have mercy

Relinquish your hold

Upon my tortured soul...

 ~S~